Over the past few months of my life I have gone through a lot. Especially dealing with my personal relationships. The entire situation has been confusing and hurtful for all that were involved. Throughout everything I kept praying to God to give me strength and to lead me in the right path. But you know what's funny about being a human and asking God to show you the way? We normally interpret things WRONG! Who knew that I have been doing that for months on end?
When a person asks God to give her strength or patience, for instance, God will give her something to be strong/patient about. Well, go me. I spent 6 months asking God to give me strength to make the right choices and every time He gave me a situation I could have made the right decision in....you guessed it, I chose the wrong way out.
In a way I was intentionally ignoring what God was putting right in front of me, but I didn't see it that way! When I was in the situation [until now] I had thought that I just kept being tempted by the devil and I needed to keep praying for my strength from God to get through my struggles. Now, I'm much wiser and realize that God was trying to help me out and give me strength. I just kinda didn't realize what He was trying to do.
I feel as if lots of people have that problem. We pray for some certain "thing" from God and when He gives us the opportunity to grow we kind of crash and burn.
From now on I am going to try so hard not to fall and neglect what God is putting out for me to do.
Okay, back to the story. I don't want this to be a blog post of some sap story about my life. But God has really shown me something amazing and I can't help but want to share it. I, ladies and gentlemen, have opened my heart up. I mean really, and truly opened my heart up to another human being. For months I have been questioning what to do and who to turn to and the person was right under my nose the entire time. I have only ever been myself when with this person and can't imagine spending time with anyone else.
You may ask, "Well, what the heck? why did it take you so long?" And let me tell you, I am asking myself the same thing. But the thing with God is, is that He does things on His own time, not ours. I may have been lost for 6 months but I know what God wants for me, at least for right now.
I know that I have a lot more growing up to do but I would like to think that I am well on my way.
This man, that I am opening my heart to, is no one new. He is not some unexpected guy that just walked in to my life. He has been around for awhile and I am so lucky that I know him.
I'm sorry that this post is not my norm, but I just thought I should share.
We all go through hard times where it is hard for us to really listen to what God is saying but, if we can block out the rest of the world and purely focus on what God is saying, I think we would all be better off. God really does know what is best for us and in His own way He shows us that. We just need to trust Him a little bit more.
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